


Serous

by woa



Series: Serous [1]
Category: Fall Out Boy
Genre: Genderfluid Character, Genderfluid Patrick, Pre-Band
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-09
Updated: 2015-02-13
Packaged: 2018-03-11 09:00:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3321578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/woa/pseuds/woa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes Patrick isn't Patrick, or he is- except he's not really a he, but a she. </p><p>Or....<br/>The one where Patrick is genderfluid</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It was a regular day. Patrick woke up (too early). His mom screamed at him that he was going to be late for school. The only problem was that Patrick didn’t feel like Patrick. He didn’t feel like a he. This wasn’t the first time. Years ago Patrick woke up feeling like - well- a girl. He was young, naive, and innocent and he had ran straight to his mother. He then said “Mommy, today I’m a girl, okay?” and he had expected his mom to open up her arms and hug him and tell him she loved him even if he was a she and that her daughter was just as good as her son. But instead Patrick’s mother had laughed and told Patrick “No honey, you’re my little boy, today and everyday.” And when _she_ tried to argue that no, not today, today _she_ was a girl, _her_ mother firmly said “No Patrick, get this nonsense out of your head.” and ~~_she_ ~~ he did, and Patrick never said a thing- to anyone- ever again. So now here he- **he god** **dammit** \- was just 17 and whenever he had these days, well he didn’t say anything. And who would he tell anyway- he had no friends at school, and there was Joe, but he wasn't going to tell Joe- his only friend (if that), who was the manliest man ever. Speaking of Joe- he was coming over today, bringing some guy whose name Patrick couldn't remember.

And Patrick really hated talking to new people any day- he was shy, and pale, and fat- but on ‘ _girl_ ’ days he didn’t like talking to **ANYONE**. His teachers would call him _Mister Stumph_ and the kids at school never called him anything good. The pronouns like he, his, him that were thrown his way just made Patrick cringe. But was truly made days like today unbearable was the fact that  he was wrong, and there wasn’t anything Patrick wanted to do except hid away in bed or maybe smother himself with a pillow. He felt so wrong on these days where he wasn’t a he that he just wanted to die ~~(and he had a date set)~~. **He was wrong**.

Still Patrick got up and went to school. He kept his head down and didn’t speak to anyone (this was normal) and didn’t really participate, even in music (normal on days like this) went straight home, changed into shorts, and messed around with GarageBand until Joe texted him- reminding him that “‘Pete’ and I are on our way, so get ready, because you’re auditioning for the band, okay?” Which Patrick hadn’t known, he knew that Joe was forming a band, but not that he was invited to join. And that made Patrick feel good inside. So Patrick got up and went to the basement- thankful that his family wasn’t home- and cleaned up a bit, clearing a space before running back upstairs when the doorbell rang.

**  
**Patrick opened the door. Standing on the porch was Joe, dressed in a t-shirt and baggy jeans with a stupid grin and his hair sticking up everywhere. Next to him was a guy( _?_ ) with straight jet black hair, who was wearing sparkly girl jeans with a purple hoodie with black skulls and eyeliner.

“Seriously Joe?” The guy asked

“This is the spectacular singer? He looks like my grandfather- no offense to your style man.”

Patrick cringed- not because of the rip on his clothes but the pronouns and gendered words. But he quickly fixed his face into a scowl.

“Joe, what the hell?” Patrick asked leaning on the door. 

Joe for his part looked guilty, “Remember last weekend when we were hanging out and playing and you started singing and I said like ‘wow dude’ or something and so I was telling Pete and dude just let us in and ignore Pete- he’s an asshole.”

And Joe shoved past Patrick into his house making his way to the kitchen yelling back

“Is your mom home, man? Will she make me cookies? Mrs. Stumph!?”

Patrick scoffed before opening the door further and beckoned Pete in.

“Thanks, man” Pete mumbled and followed Patrick into the kitchen after Joe, not catching Patrick's cringe. Joe was digging through the fridge when they arrived. Patrick sat down at the table, Pete taking the chair next to him.

Patrick turned to Pete, quirked an eyebrow and asked “He high?” to which Pete nodded and said “Don’t worry I drove, though it was rather difficult to find your how following his directions.”

Patrick ~~giggled~~ chuckled.

“Patrick, where’s your mom? She makes the best food for me.” Joe whined.

Patrick sighed “That’s because you’re always high when you eat my mom’s cooking.”

Pete snorted. Joe turned, closed the fridge and set down a container of last night’s leftover mashed potatoes.

“Well yeah, and I love your mom even more cause she doesn’t judge.”

Patrick raised an eyebrow.

“Microwave is behind you jackass” Patrick directed and Joe stuck out his tongue and scooped up some potatoes with his hand and ate them cold.

“That’s disgusting.” Pete remarked nudging Patrick and laughing.

“Dude you drank your own piss- so don’t talk to me.” Joe said with a mouthful of potatoes.

Patrick snorted but didn’t knock Pete’s head off his shoulder when Pete leaned on him.

“So, Patrick,” Pete drew out his name, “Joe here says you can sing” it wasn’t a question, more like an invitation and a slight challenge.

“Did he? Well did he also tell you that I don’t like to?” Patrick glared at Joe, who huffed

“He thinks he’s bad or something, c’mon Patrick just sing for Pete, I’m telling you- I wasn't even high that day. Let’s just go down stairs and just do one song for us man”

Joe got up and moved towards the basement door, dragging Pete along. Pete in turn pulled Patrick. Once down Joe picked up his guitar he had left. Pete sat down behind Patrick’s drum kit. Both looked expectantly at Patrick.

Patrick sighed, picked up his own guitar and before he lost his nerve strummed up a song he had been working on and began to sing

“I got those jetpack blues......”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pete finds out...  
> in a weird way that only Pete could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BTW. time frame and shit is gonna be off, and i know that the band had other drummers before Andy, but Andy is my baby and i love him so he's the drummer (but he's not in this chapter, just mentioned)

**5 months later**

Patrick honestly didn’t know how this had happened. But here ~~she~~ he was in Pete’s room, on Pete’s bed -  in a skirt-, with Pete closing the door and locking it. Patrick had been shopping in the local salvation army store, and had on a whim pulled out a wrongly placed skirt- a black box pleated skirt. ~~She~~ he had gone in to try it on, hiding it between pairs of jeans. And then somehow Pete had been there too. And since Pete had no concept of personal space or privacy he had climbed under the dressing room door and saw Patrick in the black skirt. And for a minute or so Pete had stood, staring with his mouth open. Then in a blur Patrick had been man-handled out of the store- Pete paying for the skirt Patrick still had on- into Pete’s car and to his house, then his room. Now Patrick was sitting and Pete was staring. “So.....” Pete started, wetting his lips. And Patrick braced ~~herself~~ himself for yelling and scolding, but Pete continued.

“You look nice.....” and Patrick started. ~~She~~ he felt herself himself blush.

Pete rushed on, “Is this- I mean like... Is this like a sex thing or just like a thing, thing, like fuck, I’m sorry I just dragged you here, but like jesus if you want to leave- if I’m overstepping some line- I know I seem like an asshole, but if this is something you want me to leave alone man, I will, but if you want to tell me what’s up... well I’m here for you dude, and I’ll listen and I won’t judge you - or well I will but that’s because I’m your friend and a jerk, but you’ve been there for me, so fuck, I’m rambling, just like yes or no.”

Pete abruptly stopped and stared at Patrick, who was still blushing and whose mouth was slightly open in awe.

“I- um- you promise that if I tell you it won’t like change anything between us or the band? Like I would be kicked out?”

~~She~~ he asked carefully and Pete quickly nodded, sitting down with his back against the door.

“Well, I, um god this is stupid” Patrick mumbled and ~~she~~ he tried to bring ~~her~~ his knees up to hide behind, but with the skirt it was impossible without flashing Pete, which ~~she~~ he **wouldn’t** do. Pete moved up and sat beside Patrick on his bed.

“C’mon Tricky, I think it’s important, so just tell me man.” Pete then pulled Patrick in for a hug and ~~she~~ he felt tears going down ~~her~~ his cheeks.  

“It’s just, I’m scared.” Patrick confessed.

Pete looked down still holding her him.

“Why?” Pete asked.

Patrick wiped at ~~her~~ his tears

“‘Cause the only person I’ve told was my mom and she told me I was being silly and that I was **wrong!** **And I don’t want to feel wrong! Not when sometimes I wake up and don’t feel like Patrick- like her little boy!** ”

Patrick wailed and Pete held ~~her~~ him tightly. After ~~she~~ he had calmed down Patrick started explaining.

“Sometimes I wake up and I don’t feel like a boy, I feel like a girl, and some days I feel like neither a boy or a girl or a mix of both. I know it’s stupid-”

Pete abruptly pulled back, cutting Patrick off before ~~she~~ he could wallow in misery and self-pity.

Pete then said in a strong, almost harsh tone

“No, Patrick, jesus, whatever you’re feeling- you’re not stupid or wrong. I don’t entirely understand it, because I don’t feel like that, but for the love of god Patrick you are not wrong. Trick, you’re golden.”

Pete stared into ~~her~~ his eyes and took a deep breath.

“Do you want me to call you something else- on days that you don’t feel like a guy? Should I use different pronouns? Ah, fuck, I’ve been calling he and man and shit- is today a... girl day? Like is that what’s with the skirt?”

Pete waved his hands about and he looked flustered.

But Patrick was smiling and she ( _ **SHE**_ ) reached out and hugged her best friend.

“Thank you” she whispered,

“Thank you for accepting me for who I am, and how I feel”

She pulled away and smiled brightly at Pete.

“And, uh, yeah today’s a girl day- and if you could- I mean if you’re comfortable with it could you use like she and her and stuff?”

She looked down and fiddled with her skirt as she asked. Pete smiled and let out a relieved sigh

“Of course, ma- um girl? sorry, but yeah I will, but I may mess up- and like if I misgender you, like if I call you the wrong pronouns or something just hit me.”

Pete laughed and lied down, staring at Patrick who giggled.

“But you’re going to have to tell me, Trick, and you had mentioned days where you’re not strictly boy or girl, so should I use different pronouns then?”

Patrick bit her lip and answered carefully,

“I don’t know, I never really thought about this- I’ve sorta lived my whole life being perceived as a guy, even if I didn’t feel like one. Can I think about that?”

She looked at Pete closely, who nodded and answered

“Yeah, okay next question, the skirt- like would you be comfortable wearing your girl clothes around me- cause that would make pronouns easier to identify, like only when we’re alone, unless you’d feel comfortable with Joe and Andy knowing? Cause when we start touring, if you have days like today I don’t want you to have to hide.”

Patrick blushed as she mumbled something.

“What?” Pete asked leaning towards her.

“I want to tell Andy and Joe, and I would wear girly stuff, but I don’t have any. This skirt was like an impulse buy- and I wasn’t even going to buy it, you did.....”

She repeated louder.

Pete squinted and bit his lip.

“Would you like to? Have more girly clothes?” Pete asked and Patrick blushed (again), but smiled.

“Are you offering to take me shopping, Pete?” She asked, jokingly, but Pete surprised her by nodding.

“Yeah, but you’re buying everything- I don’t have that much money, and I already got you that cute skirt” Pete winked and got up to look for his wallet.

Patrick laughed and everything was the same, Pete was still Pete and now Patrick was Patrick.

“I’m thinking we go back to Salvo and get you clothes and we come back here before practice, unless you have something else to do on this fine summer evening?” Pete joked. Patrick smiled but shook her head and offered her hand to Pete, who pulled her up off the bed and out the door.

 

Pete and Patrick spent two hours scouring the racks in Salvation Army, Patrick coming out with 5 shirts, 2 more skirts, 4 dresses, 3 ‘girl’ pants (and one for Pete), and a pair of heels. Pete then dragged Patrick to the mall - to an actual store, where she bought 3 panties, 1 push up bra, and 2 pairs of tights. After shopping they had gone back to Pete’s place and Patrick modeled all her new outfits- mixing and matching- before choosing to wear one of the dresses- a dark blue sundress with a bateau neckline and a pair of tights a shade darker. Pete had then pushed her onto a chair and done her hair and makeup (trust Pete to have makeup) and she loved it **!** After spinning around and around, skipping throughout Pete’s empty house, staring into the mirror, and thanking Pete dozens of times she and Pete played video games and worked on the new song.

****  
  



	3. Chapter 3

Patrick was nervous, so nervous that she felt like she was going to throw-up, and she told Pete this before running upstairs to the hall bathroom, leaving Pete to let Joe and Andy in.

Sitting on the floor opposite the toilet she heard Joe ask about where she was and Pete tell him that **Patrick** was upstairs and that **Patrick** wanted to tell them something important, but **Patrick** was afraid of how they would take it.

She could hear Pete’s emphasize her name instead of using pronouns and she loved him even more for it.

Taking a deep breath Patrick pushed herself up off the bathroom floor, straightened her dress, checked her hair and makeup in the mirror, and on unsteady legs made her way downstairs.

 

In Pete’s kitchen Joe was eating a PB&J sandwich while Andy was scolded Pete on the meat in the fridge when Patrick peered in, angling herself so that her body was hidden behind the wall and only her face peeked out.

“Patrick!” Joe cheered, effectively cutting off Andy’s rant.

Joe swallowed the bite of sandwich in his mouth and waved Patrick in.

“Hey” Andy waved and Pete waved her in.

Patrick took a deep breath, bit her lip, and walked into the kitchen.

Both Andy and Joe’s eyes widened and Andy’s mouth fell open.

There was a long pause and Patrick looked down at her feet (covered in the blue tights).

Pete looked between his 3 friends anxiously.

Joe was the one to actually break the silence.

“So um.... What’s up Patrick?”

He pulled out a chair next to him for Patrick to sit.

Patrick shyly sat down, pulling at her dress.

Quietly she spoke.

“So um- I - have something to tell you, obviously... I mean I- um- I, look I sometimes feel- no, some days I am a girl and somedays I’m a boy, and sometimes I’m both, or neither, and right now, today, I’m a girl.”

Again everyone lapsed into silence for a too long.

And Pete eventually broke it by saint too loud and too cheerfully,

“Pizza anyone? I’m going to order pizza, okay? Okay, cheese? yeah”

and Joe cut in before neither Pete or Andy could say anything more about the pizza.

He addressed Patrick -

“So like do you want me- us- too like call you something else?”

Joe’s voice was calm and Pete’s jaw dropped and Patrick felt shocked- she hadn’t expected this.

“Um, just Patrick and stuff is fine, but if you could use pronouns like she/her/hers on days like today, that would be awesome.”

Joe nodded and took another bite of his sandwich, then said to Pete

“Cheese is good.”

Pete- whose mouth was still open- looked at Andy as Patrick to a shaky breath.

“Okay,” Andy said

“I don’t really understand it, and like does this have a technical name? I’ll call you whatever you want, like even Your Highness, because you’re my friend, but I’d like to research and understand it as best I can, but seriously good for you Patrick. You seem really happy like this. Also Pete, why don’t you order from Spak Brothers? They’re vegan friendly.”

And yeah, Patrick was happy.

Her friends accepted her. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is probably going to be the end. I might do a sequel. Like when FOB is touring, and/or the hiatus, and/or current day. maybe?


End file.
